I Am Just Passing By

A friend of mine just lost her father last night.

I was in tears when I left her house this morning after listening to Pn Noraidah's explanation of our friend's father's 'final moments'.

It made me think of my destiny which I can't foretell when exactly it's going to take place.

About 15 days ago, I was in the hospital and here I am today, able to enjoy 85 per cent of my normal life which I used to have. In fact, after I return to work, I am even happier than before. Thursday was a 'trial', Friday was getting more real and Saturday was a good one! Of course, I met two people who made statements like "The surgery was only a minor one, right?" and "OK, there's work for you...". Hey, please learn to be more understanding!

Never mind, back to my destiny.

43 years have passed and I have breathed in the wonderful oxygen (and other gases) , and perhaps I should also add that I have escaped a number of mishaps unscathed. Let's have a quick check at the list of events that I may have encountered along my 'path':

-went to school, yes; went to uni(s), yes;
-fell in love, yes; fell out of love, thank God no;
-have a family, yes; have a career, yes;
-hate my workplace, no 'coz hate is a strong word;
-lost my loved ones, yes I lost my father 10 years ago and my grandparents whom I adored so much and my uncles (I loved them too);
-financial difficulties, yes; receiving unexpected 'durian runtuh' ( a windfall), yes 3 times at least excluding the bonus for the government servants (ehem, be nice to me this month);
-lost my belongings, ..... (can someone answer this one for me?),
-feeling appreciated, yes; feeling neglected, unfortunately yes also;
-being slim, yes (not so long ago); being not so slim,.....(answer this one for me, please).................oh, the list goes on.

When I reach my destiny, I wish that I'll be ushered to the door marked 'Heaven'. But for now, I need to do the right things, and I shall always want to do just that. Excuse me, let me pass now.

*I wish to offer my condolences to Pn Anita and her family (I know Hanani Hani F2 and Hazwani Hani F3).

The True Meaning of A Wedding Anniversary

Told you! August is a fantastic month. So far, I feel good waking up in the morning to another wonderful day!

Last Tuesday was no exception as I marched to my room after clocking in at the office. As usual, I arranged my books and files and I started recalling my plans for the day.

I knew that Tuesday was always my busiest day. But my morning duty was checking the teachers' attendance and assigning people to do relief duties, for the morning lessons as well as Memburu Bintang. But in the back of my mind I still remembered how my other half grabbed my hand this morning and wished me "Happy 18th Anniversary".....I was all smiles....

My smiles were shortlived when this very Tuesday turned out to be such a busy day..... Almost everybody in school was buzzing around the school, fixing the Resource Centre and putting up notices etc etc, all in the spirit of taking part in a National level competition for the best School Resource Centre (PSS) in Malaysia.

To my horror, and perhaps to my relief, during the morning housekeeping, my boss no. 2 mentioned about the Pondok in the school which was one of the important venues that needed to be spruced up. Hey, wait a second, Pondok? Which one was mine?

Actually I had spent a number of days hibernating in the Language Room, also going to a few hardware shops and persuading our gardener to do some 'touch-ups'. Little did I realise that apart from that room and another room (Bilik Intervensi), I should also check on the pondok! But as far as I could remember, my teachers had already decorated our pondok.

So, I went the the pondok just to confirm that I need not do anything else and I was already set for a memorable wedding anniversary celebration!

Eventualy, I found that the pondok was already decorated by my teachers plus a sign board which was full of materials put up by ???? , but, but....there was a sign "Balai Ilmu Jabatan so and so". Hey, that's not my department! There must have been a mistake!!!!! I was then left with 2 other old and abandoned pondoks! There was one more pondok but I could not figure out whose!

To cut the story short, I immediately contacted a few people , arguing with them, venting out my frustrations.... but of course I did that just so that people realised that a proper communication and proper assignment was to be given when implementing any school programme. No hard feelings, really.

This time my husband was not spared the task of repairing the dilapidated pondok. I contacted my husband asking him to help me out! I really did not expect him to agree without any hesitation but that was exactly what had happened. A few teachers (who were the hardworking type) offered to help me but I only asked them for ideas and for any materials they could lend me as I knew how terribly busy they were.

We completed the task with the support from Pn Norwapidah who sent a few students to carry the flower pots and not forgetting the Form 1 Melati boys who were so obliging. It was cute that they wrote down their names on a piece of paper and reminded me to record their contribution in the Merit Files.

At about 6pm my husband and I left the school with the little energy we had left. Thank God I did not let Aaron stay back to help me as he had offered to do so.

Indeed I treasure this 18th wedding anniversary spent at the 2 pondoks!

I Am Back!

At last! My son is back from Kelantan! It must be an exciting journey and he got to do some shopping with his friends at Rantau Panjang. Well, shopping is not his top priority, only the fun that accompanies it that matters. Yeah, shopping with friends instead of with mum.

It was good of him to remember sending his mum messages while he was there. At least he sent her the good night wishes, as usual as though he was at home.

In the mean time, mum was deprived of the privilege that she normally enjoyed. As she came back from work at about 3.30 pm last Saturday, she felt like cooking. So, off she went to the kitchen. After proudly serving lunch/early dinner to the whole family, she was disgusted to find that the Streamyx connection had become cranky again.

But tonight, she is back! She will spend some time writing in her blog.....while eating some keropok lekor from Kelantan.

July!

Soon, in less than 7 minutes, we will be in the second half of the year!

SPM is fast approaching. And so does UPSR. My boy is taking SPM and my daughter is sitting for UPSR. And so do many students in Malaysia.

As a teacher and a mother, I would like to help guide my children and my students. Maybe I am born this way, maybe I am born to serve. Wow, it sounds quite noble even though the fact is that I am just me.

Often, I find myself to be blessed with a number of incidents which are actually a blessing in disguise. If you know the poem "The Road Not Taken", you will understand just what it is like taking one road, only having to forego the other. What is said and done, must be done earnestly. At times, you also need to choose between two options and this tests your ability to use your head over your heart.

On 1 July 1997, I decided only to use the English Language with my children....a tough decision but it is indeed proven to be fruitful. They have not become the Mat Sallehs, neither have that guaranteed A1 for their English Language. However, it has helped them acquire the language easily , just like their friends acquiring their mother tongue. Not all Malay students can score A1 for BM , right?

I won't praise them yet. It is just my nature to reserve compliments and praises unless to the deserving ones.........and that never takes place after a brief acquaintance.

So, July 2008 (which will never be repeated in the history of my life), here I come!

Time

What is time? It is a word that has different shades of meaning. This beautiful word 'Time' can be used to refer to a specific point in time (eg 11.15 pm) , and it can also be used to refer to 'the period of time that someone spends doing something' (eg. How does she find time to write her books?)

Time passes despite your attempts to kill it, to idle away or to use it to the optimum. Time seems brief when you are enjoying it but peculiarly, that very same 'time' can be never-ending when you are bored. The clock seems to have ceased ticking!

As a teacher, when you are invigilating a bunch of kids who cannot sit still, during an English Language paper 1 (Form 4 or 5), you know better than to hope that these kids would spend their time writing the right stuff. Take a closer look and you might be able to see that the ones who are furiously writing are actually copying down the questions.... Well, at least they are learning to write.

If you are recuperating from an illness or to the mothers out there, after you have had your baby, you need some time to get your health into shape. 6 weeks prove to be an ideal time for confinement (mums, you know what I mean).

This healing process is slow yet it can do wonders. If you are hurt, you need time too.... After living for more than 4 decades, I have learnt to accept the fact that sometimes you must heal yourself quietly and graciously. Of course, sometimes you cannot escape the 'sharp eyes' who never miss 'it'. But eventually, you are back to your dignified self. You just need time.....