Love Story- Part 2: If You Love Someone

Ever been in love?

Ever wondered why you are at ease in someone's presence?

Ever think twice why you do dream about someone?

Have you???

I ................ love!

But this time (2009) , I am well aware of what's going on around me..... and what are his weaknesses....because he is not perfect , and neither do I.

When we first exchanged glances, I found him a very attractive person. Thank God, I was a shy person myself (and still am).

He showed me that he did care about me by obliging himself to take me to Pudu Raya every time I went back for the long holidays. I must be either blind or too innocent to understand the 'signals' he was sending to me. Anyway, he was simply charming!

When it was about time I left for Australia, (and he was going to UK!) , my sixth sense (finally I was using my sixth sense in our relationship), told me to see with my 'four eyes' ....... thus soon I realised that he had started showing anxieties over our imminent 'separation'. I wasn't blind anymore!

(to be continued)

Yes, It's Worth It!

"Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way": Daniele Vare.

My attempts at digesting and churning the information I receive every day have made me a rather 'great thinker' (quoting the term used by a classmate of mine in 1982). I breath in deeply and I chew my food intently..... and I am never free from making mistakes.

"Please make as many mistakes now!...." is a phrase I keep using in order to make my present form 5 students feel more at ease during my lessons. I despise the unnecessary 'peaceful' atmosphere in the class, when every student is afraid of asking, though they are very much tempted to pose one or two questions....sad....especially if they have been trained to shut their mouths (as this is deemed to be the best and most acceptable manners).

Correct me if I am wrong, but I must say that children are able to point out our mistakes (and shame us at the same time, because of their frankness). It is a wonder how my dad had allowed me to be frank with him despite his stern and conventional way of bringing up his children. Perhaps he wanted me to be able to speak my mind, ..... perhaps so.

Through years of trial and error, I can deduce that by putting in efforts to make your opinions sound less threatening, people can accept you with open arms. Get the message across but save the sword that might hurt them. Diplomacy does not kill!

Holiday Or Not Holiday?

Ringggg!!!

"Cikgu, hari Isnin nanti ..............."

Yuk!

That was at 7.40 this morning. I received a call from a PPD officer,......(and the rest is history)

Now I must get ready to go jalan-jalan as well as do some shopping at Tesco, to replenish some household items (which are constantly diminishing).... before heading to school because I am 'on duty' this afternoon. Frankly, I don't mind it at all..............

But, on Monday! No!

That is not my choice, I know.

Must go now..... Happy Deepavali / Holidays!

Why I Did Not Apply For A Transfer This Time

When I first filled out the form to apply for a transfer it was in the year 1991. I had to because my husband and I were living separately. The second time it happened was in 2000. Or was it in 1999?

I was in SEGAR and I needed a change. No wonder I took up a Masters course in 1999, it was simply vital...........

My application (to get a transfer) was rejected because the school (SBPI Rawang) was not ready yet. Too early...... The following year saw me applying again and rejected (yet again) because there were people from KL who needed to be posted in Rawang since they had bought a new house at Bandar Tasik Puteri.

Time really flies....

As soon as I graduated from the university in 2003, I applied to go to SEMEKAR. That was the turning point. I got the transfer , much to the astonishment of my colleagues, the principal of the new school and myself!

(to be cont'd)

Of Rendang and Paperwork

These two shall never be the best of friends. What? Preparing rendang, serving the ketupat, the cookies and then?....... checking my bag, my handbag (even though of late, I hardly use my handbag), photostating exercises for my students, ironing baju kurung to be worn next week (the last time I put on bk was on the first Hari Raya) and going to my room at my school to see if there was anything to be done.

Yesterday morning I went to get the past year paper to be given to the form 4 students as 'Gerak gempur' from the office. Thank God the material was already printed , hence I did not waste much time. I set myself to get every thing stapled before 2 pm. Indeed it was stapled and labelled by 2.01 pm! Not bad, I told myself. Actually I was just helping out the form 4 teachers since they were all in their respective kampong.

Later that evening I went back to school to put the material in the office because it was needed on Monday morning. My husband reminded me that most probably his friends would be coming on Saturday (yes, today). So, we decided to shop for some chicken and some more cookies (most of the cookies bought earlier ended up eaten as snacks in front of the tv).

Today, I spent a few hours in my kitchen, and a few more hours feeling quite nervous when the guests came and tasted my 'ketupat', 'rendang ayam' , 'rendang daging' , fried noodles and perhaps after this some 'mee kari'. Even at this particular moment there is a guest in the living room.

A good night sleep will surely be enticing!

My Blue Haven?

".....When evening is nigh, I hurry to my blue haven..........."

Spending a few days at my kampong has allowed me to judge for myself the progress which is taking place. It's true that the infrastructure in Alor Gajah district is definitely something I am proud of. A number of private-owned lands are left undeveloped, but the areas owned by the state government are well maintained. The list is long, from an organised farming project to parks which are beautiful, the superb 'toll-free highway' and a well-equipped hospital.

My youngest daughter was down with high fever (and she was showing symptoms of 'Influenza-Like Illness' , if I wish to exaggerate) and I knew that my first Raya was going to be spent at the district hospital. Indeed that's the place we went to, as soon as food was served and the guests had started arriving at my mom's house.

The professional treatment I received from these supposedly 'kampong' people would be the envy of the Rawang and Selayang hospital staff (and even the private hospitals' in Kuala Lumpur). Moreover, I only spent RM1 for the entire treatment.

Perhaps Alor Gajah is my blue haven.............

Oh Mr Burglar

What a post right before Hari Raya!

Instead of reminiscing about my ever wonderful Hari Raya..... or about last year's Hari Raya when I prepared rendang etc for my students, (and instead they came on the following day, when I chose to laze around, but I was more than happy to entertain my guests, anyway.....)...... yes, instead of all that I am now thinking about the safety of my belongings while I go back to my kampong.

Furthermore, I have to plan the route to take (Plan A and Plan B, and perhaps a Plan C!). I must also foresee the problems which might arise with regard to the traffic flow, my car and also the weather.

On top of that, burglary has been quite rampant lately in my housing area....

Frankly, I lost almost 100 per cent of my valuables during a break-in in 2007. That was one terrible year of losses............ But hey, Mr Burglar, I just do not want you to do the same again!

Having said that, I wish to welcome my dearest students and ex-students to my house during Hari Raya. I am not a chef but I think I enjoy cooking for you. So, welcome to my humble abode!

Wiser

I think I am one more week wiser (since 9.9.09), even though the last entry was only 4 days ago....

My wonderful life has been 'smeared' with streaks of incidents which may have a lasting effect on my life.

I shall remember one word indefinitely..........."FORGOT" and its cousin : "FORGOTTEN".

First: Someone forgot to fulfil a task which I reminded him to do, oh a no no, especially when nobody else wished to be seen as an accomplice in this blunder.

Second: Out of goodwill, I took the trouble to get a letter photostated but later forgot to pass the letter to its rightful owner. This was not a serious one as the situation was rectified as soon as I realised it.

Third: A blatant disregard of 'remember'. I think I don't wish to remember it either.

I am wiser now.

Where Have You Been?

Obviously, I was not in London, visiting the Queen.

My students dear, I would like to apologise for 'neglecting' you (physically)..... However, the fact is that my one-week holiday was filled with marking the exam paper . The following week was also filled with the same activity ....... but today I believe that the sacrifice is really, really worth it!

This week I am carrying out another duty which is new to me. I am not bragging when I say that I have been 'well groomed' ( by the government department) to perform my duty this week... I learn to be more meticulous and erm... considerate.

I am missing the eager faces in my form 1 and form 3 classes. I also miss my form 5 students but they are busy with the SPM trial examinations.

In the midst of this 'busy-ness', I received a call from DN. Thanks........... hope you are doing well at Uniten.

To Kill or Not To.........

As I was driving back home from school today, I almost hit a motorcyclist who was hell-bent on killing himself. I am not trying to be defensive here. Trust me, it's not dangerous driving on my part!

After more than 4 years behind the wheel, I have more faith in myself in ferrying my passengers.... I know 4 is a small number. Yes, that's a good guess, and it's true that I had actually been 'driving' the car whenever I took the passenger seat since 1988- the year I passed my driving test.

But youngsters (especially), please love your life more! Or at least please be more considerate and just abide by the traffic rules...

Lost and Found

When an acquaintance of mine was once deeply hurt, she did become rude and started using abusive words to describe her predicament.

I was purely innocent and not the cause of her turning melancholy........... In fact, I was rather a saviour at that delicate moment. Yes, I was. She knew it too.

The passing of time was another factor which mellowed her down. Consequently, we both could continue with our lives, working together , with a greater understanding of the pitfalls awaiting us.

For a moment, when she was in the trough, she seemed to lose her grip, if not losing her face. Nevertheless, she was adamant that she should not lose her heart.

In this respect, I do salute her...... though my admiration for her did not surpass that point.... because too much of a thing is simply bad.

Having said that, all is not lost. Through the pains of others I have learnt quite a number of life lessons. More importantly, I have found remedies to many ailments..... at least just to lessen the pain.... as long as it is not as serious as the Influenza A (H1N1).

I Am Against Bullies! ( and Bulldozers!)

When I was young(er), I loved to experiment with a number of risky decision making.

Pa obviously did not fancy the thought of me making any blunder at all, but I had to.....

In restrospect, I guess I am still quite the same. I like to question the norm.....

I wonder why filing and documentations are still redundant when we want to save paper!

I wonder why we are blindly following the tradition if this customary acts involve a waste of time..... or a waste of resources....

I wonder too why people can not speak to children with respect. In fact, sometimes, some people are the real bully when it comes to dealing with the youngsters (and also with their subordinates).

Some people can get carried away with this 'bully' act........ when the youngsters seem helpless.... or when their subordinates are apparently helpless.....

That's one reason why I have high regards for people who treat me with such kindness and sincerity even when I was just a kid (and also when they could choose to ignore me). Thank you!

Let's weed out bullies!

Sahur

My two boys seem to be ardent fans of the internet. They have occupied this chair for quite some time before I successfully take over ........

By the way, it is the holy month of Ramadhan .....and we are not spared the thrill of performing the fasting ibadah together , with family members and with all the Muslims all over the globe.

Actually, this year the first week of Ramadhan coincides with the mid-term holidays. Hence, my culinary skills are put to the test again (because since Mum is not going to school, she must be preparing some delicious meal for Sahur - which we take at about 5 am).

At this moment, I am thinking of making 'nasi lemak' for sahur. Emm, how's that? I hope one of my children has brought in some pandan leaves from the backyard.....Otherwise, the menu has got to be changed. I'd better start cooking now, bye2...

How's Every Body?

All praise to God for allowing me to have internet access again!!!!

After weeks of staring at the blank monitor....waiting ....and hoping.... that Streamyx would get me connected.....I gave up!

Finally I went to TM Rawang to terminate my subscription.........................good bye Streamyx!

Now I am here again. Hi!

Mr L Chai Kok

The only time this name was mentioned again, (after 32 years) , was in December last year when I bumped into one primary schoolmate of mine.

Mr L was the most tiger-like teacher I had ever known. However, I do come across other 'tigers' during my adult life. Perhaps, I was once a tigress myself, until I was mellowed over the years of climbing up the stairs to the classes...............

The tiger I know has probably passed on.......... but he will always be remembered for his fierce disposition, but yet, responsible, caring and a real sifu of the English Language. He even liked to hug us when we felt downhearted (you know 12 year-old girls).

Whatever it is, this is one tiger (apart from my own pa) whom I like very much.

"You Have Changed"

That's what my old friend was telling me.

Of course. Every thing changes.

I am not the same person you knew a few months ago. In fact, I might change totally if left unchecked!

The people who cross my path do shape my personality, if not my wisdom. But I'm too 'young' to be GREATLY influenced by circumstances, TRY HARDER!

I am here to stay............

Why Cats Are Not Called Dogs

Do you know why?

Me? Don't know. (Some of my students might add "Don't care").

BM is definitely not BI either.

If we were born in England and we were to live with the native speakers of English, then it is simple mathematics why we too speak the language.

Sometimes I feel sick in my stomach when all the Mr Know All write to the editor's column about why the standard of English (in our country) has deteriorated over the years.

Are they saying that 50 years ago , if all Malaysians were to sit for the SPM English Language paper, the average grade would be better than what it is today?
Are they saying that the English words were pronounced more correctly by our forefathers?

The only succinct explanation of their claims is that - many, many years ago, the small group of people who received their education at the English schools could speak the language more confidently. (Ironically, at the same time, the majority of Malaysians , who were denied access to that sort of education, could hardly construct a proper sentence in English).

Think wisely, again, man!

Having said that, I have no statistical evidence to back my deductions.

I can only conclude by saying that I really appreciate the great efforts made by my students and fellow teachers to master the English Language.

Besides, every one can find fault, few can do better!

19 Years As A Teacher

When Puan K joined the teaching staff of my school, she could recognise me straight away.

As I was explaining to her about her time-table and the books that she could use for her classes, she could not contain it any longer. A smile creased on her sweet face.

"Puan, actually I'm K, your student at Seri Garing. I already contacted my husband, K, who was also my classmate, to tell him that now I'm teaching with you!"

Hahaha....

What a small world it is.

Today, 11 July 2009, about 14 years after we last saw each other, I met K and K, who are now a young couple with a daughter, at our Family Day gathering.

"K, I still remember that you liked to sit near the door with A."

"Yes, and I still remember what you said to my father on the day he came to collect my report card. "

Hahaha...........(Then he actually quoted the words I said to his father). Hahaha...........

"But, teacher, thank you ...................."

Thank you to you both, too. I have learnt many things from you too.....and from many students who have been the REAL reason why I stay in this profession. Otherwise.........

When You Like Someone

Chief Inspector Barnaby must be another detective that I 'must see' every week.

After several nights worrying over what to do next and how to make things better, on every Friday and Saturday nights, I simply sit back and enjoy the investigation of murders which take place in England.

My choice of favourite tv show may equate the Discovery Channel that is a 'must see' for my other half. Well, talk about choices and preferences........... (even though I must admit that I quite like 90 per cent of this documentary).

What we like and how much we like something (or someone) is our personal choice. In fact, what we like so much today may not enjoy the same attention in 10 years time. Nevertheless, certain things are just so 'sweet' and we hold them very dear that the memories and other terms of endearment are almost impossible to be wiped out to the end of time.

Therefore, a kind gesture of appreciation should be shown NOW, before it's a day late and a dollar short.

The Blame Game

Of late, whenever I wish to create a new post, I have to spend a few minutes deciphering the instructions which simply make my mind boggle.

I don't like delays or disruptions!

After painstakingly waiting for the miraculous 'Posting' page to appear, luck is finally on my side.

Unfortunately, now I plan to reflect on the challenges which I'm facing in the first half of the unique year of 2009. See you later!

I Am Alive?

Before the G R yesterday, a team of the Rawang health personnel came to give us a simple medical check-up. The results were quite expected when the teachers were above 35 years old.

I was not spared the 'border-line' results. That is to say 'not yet there, but must take precaution before I reach anywhere near the border'......

I must be lucky.

But my driving experience was lousy today. I went to visit a friend in Setapak and when I tried to venture the DUKE route in my journey back home, a really terrible incident really made me start sw@#$%^ at the lorry (or rather, trailer) driver who had almost cost me my life ,if not my limbs!

The driver had almost squeezed me with his long, heavy trailer......much to the horror of the other drivers that after that they were too afraid to drive alongside that trailer when they were passing through the two-lane-bridges.

My other half (who thought he could just rest beside me in the car) was stunned too - but God has let us survive that unforgettable nightmare and I guess I owe it so much to God that I want to be a better person / driver after this........ I will, I tell you, I will!

G R

It's not MGR.

G R was the activity we had today. I went up and down , checking every 'station' of my Zone (B). That exercise was done for about 4 hours before we gathered for the Lucky Draw. Well, so far I had not been lucky.

In the line of duty, I encountered a few teachers who had not been very talkative to me before. These man teachers had a few things to share with me, particularly about their principles and about how to 'survive' in this treacherous world of education. Yes, you heard me right! You can't see the dangers very easily.............

As I've always mentioned before, learning is a life long precess and I value the lessons learnt today. My team didn't win the G R competition but I AM proud of all my zone members. They performed their duties with so much ease, as though G R was already in our job specification as teachers.........but again, they were and ARE good people. Thank you!

Feelings, Nothing More Than Feelings

It's what some people call 'nostalgic' .............the hours when I was slogging away , trying to mark the last few answer scripts of my 5SJ students. It was already 12.30 am, all my family members were half-way into their private dream lands. My daughter was restless, and she would come to check on me every hour.

When my better half was watching TV, the TV channel was predictably tuned to 555 (National Geographic). As soon as I saw that the TV was beginning to 'watch' him instead, I claimed ownership of the remote control, switching to 851 (yeah, some music , and perhaps some oldies to accompany me , amidst all the paper containing my students' literary works). Some old songs are really ever green..........

I particularly liked one essay entitled "The Teacher I Like Best". Let's read an excerpt of the essay. ".......I like my English teacher. Her name is Puan Haslina. She likes swimming and cooking. Her husband knows how to cook. She is happy because her husband knows how to cook. She is rich. She has a swimming pool at her house........." Gee, that was one cute essay from the adorable students of mine.

After those marking, report writing, preparing the lesson plans, compiling the reports from the various schools in Rawang (that I'm observing), and perhaps before I knew it, it was already 4 am. It's time to get some forty winks before going to school. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Of Men and Cheese (Young Men, Don't Read This!)

A true man ages like cheese!

Hold on, before I am bombarded with the 'yuks' etc, let me appease your anger by telling you that not every body likes cheese, in the first place.

(But hey, I do like cheese!)

While I was at the hair salon yesterday, my daydreams took me to the time when I was younger, more energetic and lighter. I had 5 children fewer and my salary was less than half what I earn now. I was more naive than now , not very demanding and a bit more sensitive at times ........

What I did have at that time did not seem important (and was not well regarded), not until my size ballooned and I began to feel weak..............

Thank God, maturity is not meant to be taken cynically....... Fast forward, 17 years later, I have encountered numerous events which help strengthen my personality. I have accepted the fact that I shall never be called 'young lady' anymore. (Once, a student of mine teased me by asking whether there was any body in the school who called me 'makcik'. That was one @#$% of a joke, but I did laugh...)

Well, on the other hand, my other half is not spared the 'metamorphosis'............but his is a different story. Apart from the physical changes (getting more good-looking), he has become more even-tempered ..........

After I bade farewell to the affable hairdresser , I rushed to our car where my husband was waiting. He looked at me smiling, "OK, how was it?" were the words which echoed his smile despite the 2-hour wait!

Told you, I do like cheese................

Susan Boyle

When I was small, I thought the name 'Susan' was cool.

But that was umpteen years ago, before I knew the existence of Rawang in Selangor , or anywhere on earth, for that matter.

Anyway, Susan Boyle who has become a sensation in the first quarter of 2009, is certainly a figure not easily forgotten by millions of people........ What's the lesson here? Never, never judge a book by its cover? Yeah, it's as simple as that.

On the flip side, such lessons are erased from our minds almost instantaneously. Why can't some people spare some time to reflect on their actions and words? When will these people be really affected by the wake-up calls? It may not be my vocation to run a nation but I take it as my responsibility to instil values in children (especially), regardless of their colour.

This is the IN thing in my 'To Do' list.........

I - Robot

The days have passed without any new blog posts............

Whenever I am at home, I check back my 'To Do' list. Quite dispassionately, I begin to scrutinize every little things that must be done.

Have I become a robot?

It seems that my work has usurped my sensitivity and my wits. However, don't imagine that I have started looking like a mad woman with dishevelled hair! No,no, dear.....I still maintain that sweet , innocent looks.........and I have not lost that sensibility and intelligence which you might wish to deny.

What has happened within the last 12 days?

One important event was the SEMEKAR Race that took place on Saturday, 30 May 2009. The 131 students who came really had a lot of fun, despite having to do the Commando Crawl! Without having to threaten them, the attendance after lunch was still great even though they had gone home to change their attire! Everything went on very smoothly and I had all the English teachers and the 4 traineee teachers (Ms J, Ms N, Mr P and Ms S from UNISEL) to thank for their tireless support......Thank you!

A farewell lunch was organised one day before that (Friday, 29 May) for the trainee teachers (but they are leaving only on 26 June) and for our beautiful teacher , Pn M who is serving at SMK Bt Arang starting Monday, 1 June. My heart went to her when I listened to her speech. Among others, Pn M was calling every one to be sensible and to learn to judge people wisely......(never trust rumours, in other words). How true! Malicious remarks are insidious to the healthy form of bonds and relationships , not excluding in workplaces.........you get what I mean?

Mmm, this post is getting pretty long, hence I'd better go now. Since I am still sane and sensitive, I guess I am not a robot , as yet. Bye, bye, especially to Mas........

Between You, Me and The Gatepost

After two days coming back late from work, I decided to come back early. However, I had to take home some 'homework', specifically, I brought home 3 plastic bags of exercise books belonging to the other teachers. It was just a check on their work, and I must record this in my observation files.

Just to add insult to injury, my effort of bringing home the exercise books was unjustly rewarded by my own fault of not bringing back the stamp-pad etc etc, which were the items needed to get this !@#$% work done.

Now, suddenly I'm 'out-of-work'!

This blunder is quite a blessing in disguise. Within an hour of 'freedom', I manage to read my mails. Most of the mails are sent by some caring souls who care about my safety and my health. Sincerely, I appreciate your kind thoughts..... I'll make sure that I'll pass the info to other people who wish to be enlightened by such important facts.

I may not be able to keep in touch in other ways, but I do acknowledge the support I receive , I really do. Thank you..........

I Am Smiling

Pang! We were awakened by a noise at three in the morning. My 'hero' tiptoed to the kitchen where the sound was heard. The 'brave' me followed him in the hope of finding something harmless.

Oh, indeed it was. It's only a cat toppling my favourite pot (which had cost me almost an arm and a leg), which was already smashed to pieces..... I sighed at the thought of cleaning the floor at this wee hours. My curious little girls were found standing at the door almost as soon as I started picking up the toughened glass... I glanced at them, not really expecting them to lend a hand. However, Naimah seemed more than willing to do a fair share of this tedious cleaning-up duty. Thank you, thank you.... with her help, the job was done in about half-an-hour.

I quickly went back to bed after that, thinking that Mondays are mostly the most challenging days.....furthermore, there would be a celebration of Teachers' Day. I was smiling before I dozed off....

Fast forward, the students seemed pretty excited about giving teachers presents of all sorts. Some of the gifts could be bought at the RM2 shop, but the teachers did not seem to be bothered by the low price. Some of my students gave me a hug..... even that was sufficient.

At 10.45 am, lessons were carried out as usual. In fact, I had a class that ended at 4pm. Before I entered the class, I found Encik A reading his PTK results slip. Wow! He had scored the best grade (which was a '4'). This reminded me of my own results...........

At the office, when I opened my results slip, little did I know that I was going to see a beautiful '4' printed clearly.

I thank God for being so kind and merciful. I should be smiling (sincerely) and I hope by doing so, I could help others find their own smiles...................

Silence , It May Be

The rain is pouring outside, as though offsetting the dreary dry spell that we are experiencing lately. "Please....", I have been telling myself, "...whatever the weather, I should be thankful to God".

This is just like bonds and relationships.

A period of silence from others may be a period of agony on our part, that is if we start thinking negatively.........

I shall never allow this to overtake my rational judgement. There is no point brooding over it, as much as I despise bragging about any connections that I may have with anyone .............

I have no control over what others may think of me, but I have control over what I do......and that's exactly what I'll do, may what I do helps me maintain a good 'account' ........in the eyes of God.

The First Love Is Hard To Forget (continuation)

He was not paying attention to my existence but hey, his smiles had never left his handsome face from the first minute I saw him.

My heart beat was normal.....the vice-president of the college was standing beside me, trying to make me and my friends feel welcome to Kuala Lumpur, the place which I was going to spend my life in the next 18 months. In my eyes, the vice president wanted to seize the chance to make amends for his harsh reminder to me during the first meeting that afternoon.

Actually, I did not really care about the incident that was simply a misunderstanding....between a teenager and a man who had a lot of things to oversee in order to make his project a success. (In fact, he kept on being overly polite to me since then....)

Now, my mind was preoccupied with my new batch of friends, 7 girls and 16 boys..... all of whom seemed excited about starting their matriculation studies at this college. One of the boys (who must have been trying to break the ice) casually asked the girls to introduce ourselves. My sixth sense told me that he might be particularly interested in me........(vain!) But , in fact that was the truth, as revealed by him a few months later.

Ironically, THE OTHER BOY (whose smiles I still remember until today) did not show much progress. He was calmly eating at the table................
(to be continued)

Laser Mouths

Ever got pissed off by sarcastic remarks made by 'some people'?

Yes, join the boat. This boat ain't shaky because we, the passengers are experienced and wise adults (not without flaws, of course).

When I was small, my first disturbance was in the form of teases from cruel people regarding my appearance.

As I graduated from that phase, I was already immune to such childish remarks. In fact, all (or most of) my teenage friends found me to be reasonably friendly and level-headed. I kept on looking for the truth .....of how to counter or become resistant to any hurtful comments.

My first encounter with books on Akhlaq (or morale-boosting tips ) was an eye-opener. Of course my mother had been telling me about what's good and what's bad....but I needed something concrete.

Until now, my search has never been exhaustive, I keep on reading materials which help prevent me from sinking into the river of desperation and helplessness. Whenever I bump into my old friends or my former colleagues, I always remind myself to LISTEN and stop interrupting them when they are telling me about their experience. There is a lot to learn from others, no matter how GREAT we think we are.

All in all, the deduction I can make at this stage is that -the best way to deal with people who love to grumble (and talk bad about almost every thing) , or people who have inferiority complex (but hiding it by acting tough) or people who are simply snobbish and forget how to be respectful ......is by being firm and sure that as long as God is pleased with our actions, and we are doing the right things, then we are better than what 'these' people are trying to make us feel or think about ourselves. No hard feelings.....

Talking About First Love

I find it quite amusing to think of my first few years falling in love.

When was that? Ai, cannot tell lor.

Definitely, I'm not referring to my love for my parents or family members.

The man who captured my heart absolutely belonged to the 'good-looking' category of young adults. He was together with a few other boys of his age when I had my first glimpse of him. The other boys were quite rowdy and energetic and they were moving quite fast, unable to stay put at one place.

Being an athlete had exposed me to THAT type of boys.......I mean, I used to study in an all-girls' boarding school which did not allow me any freedom (or to be anywhere near 1 metre from the school gate). My outing was mostly on occasions where I was to take part in sports, either athletic or basketball competitions.

Once, I spent one week in Kelantan when I took part in the National MSSM . The light and slim me was to take part in an athletic event. My contingent consisted of mostly boys , of course. That one week was enough to make me feel unsure that I would ever have any relationship with any boys...simply because I found them to be uncaring and rough.

Well, back to my first love- he was simply different...... at this stage we had not exchanged words but that was exactly how I felt ....
(to be continued)

Love Will Find A Way

Rule number one: use your head more than your heart.

Rule number two: you can't afford to have your head in the clouds

Rule number three: a heart of gold is worth more than a crowned head

Rule number four: go back to Rule number one.

In a nutshell, even though a rational act comes out of a rational mind, at times when the going gets tough, and irrationality is creeping in, a moral support which stems from a genuine love is all it takes to rectify the whole situation.

Love can be wrongly interpreted..........or it can also be abused by someone manipulative..........but most importantly love is the thing that has kept me alive today, yes I mean on Monday, today.

Thank God I know what love is....and what it can do....

Speechless

If you think that I have not written for so long.....well, actually since last week, I have uttered very few words at my workplace too!

Why? - you might ask. I don't have the answer either.

In retrospect, I may have been a bit lethargic lately. Perhaps being a loyal cook to my family is something quite new to me.

Yesterday my school clerk was assigned a duty to type out letters to our ex-students who had been chosen to do form 6. A steady flow of ex-students and parents could be seen 'visiting' the office.

My work has not changed much. I can be seen carrying books to and from the parking lot. Whenever, there is a 'breathing' space, I would try completing marking my students' exercise books , as well as checking exercise books of other classes - just to check whether a healthy amount of written work has been given to the students by all the BM, English Language, Arabic, Tamil, Chinese, EST and the Malay Literature teachers.

May be that answers the question above!

The NILAM Programme

Nadi Ilmu Amalan Membaca.

I think that's the meaning of NILAM. Since April is the 'Bulan Pusat Sumber', there is one competition which is new to the teachers, which has caught my attention.

Well, if you do care to read my profile, then you should know that my other name is 'Reading and Writing'. Therefore, I have been reading quite a number of books, and I have dutifully recorded it down to fulfil the requirements. Since April the 8th (the first day I knew about the competition), I have finished reading and recorded 20 books in my NILAM record book. Actually, I am still reading my favourite books (of which some are really thick) but for the purpose of this competiton, the NILAM record book is to be submitted tomorrow.

I can't be very sure about winning this competition, but one thing I am very sure of is the fact that I begin to REALLY explore the Pusat Sumber to scout for the books of my taste. Thank you for introducing this competition. Now I know exactly what books to suggest the Co-ordinator of the Resource Centre to buy for the students after this!

The Test On Communication Skills

I have little choice but to get my students tested on their speaking ability, NOW, because soon they will be sitting for their mid-year examinations.

For the 5 MW students who love to prove their maturity in thinking, I let them do Forum. They are trying their best, I can see that!

The 3Y students who are also taking the Arabic Language for PMR have been asked to do Debate....You can guess how chaotic the debates turn out to be when someone forgets the rules. We are always laughing throughout the debates because it turns out to be really fun listening to the arguments which they are struggling to put forth.

Yesterday, I really looked forward to testing my students' speaking ability. However, immediately after the weekly assembly, the clerk called from the office (literally). "Cikgu, cikgu, there's a phone call for you". To my dismay, I found out that I was supposed to attend a meeting at Seksyen 6 Shah Alam.

I hesitated. Should I make up excuses? Unfortunately, I am not very skilful at doing that, hence I obliged myself to attend the meeting even though I had never driven to Shah Alam.

When I checked my car fuel, gosh, I needed to go to the petrol station. As soon as I had the tank filled up to the brim, my stomach sent out signals to go to the toilet immediately. Again, I rushed to my next destination which was my mother-in-law's house. When we met, she suggested I take my son along. Oh yes, good idea. So , along Hasif went with me to help me read the sign-boards.

We reached the place safely but I suggested Hasif to drive one round and come back to park the car outside the building.

I was panting, finding a chair to sit and to start a meaningful discussion at the meeting when suddenly Hasif gave me the most dreaded news of the day. "Mak, someone hit the rear of the car. She doesn't want to admit her mistake."

Oh yes, just imagine how I took the news. Even though the meeting was to proceed, I reluctantly left the meeting room to find out just what the @#*! was going on.

To my surprise, I had MY speaking , or rather communication skills , tested that day. I had to deal with the woman driver , and later her husband to come to an agreement of what to do next.

My final decision was to report the accident at the Shah Alam IPD in Seksyen 11. Here, you can guess that my driving skills were also tested. I waited for the other party to come and do the report too, but they didn't show up. So, in the end, there was no meeting for me with the Jabatan Pelajaran officers; no forums or debates....... only I had to apply my communication skills, in a manner least expected..........

Beautiful = Good

This is a story of a 'normal-looking' teacher who has been quite curious about the menacing behaviour of her students. What puzzles her is that many of them in this class will add extra points in their essays even though she expects them to elaborate on three points only. In other words, they surpass the teacher's expectation of them.

During the 'oral test', she takes the opportunity to find out about the students' interests in learning the English Language. Much to her surprise, these students ARE actually following her lessons and the tips given by her. The only obstacle is the hours they spend after school at their workplace....it seems that they are working part-time between 5 to 8 hours a day.

When asked about their past learning experience, these students seem to have their own perception of what constitutes a good lesson. Plus, it makes the teacher worried.............

"Teacher, for PMR, my ........... teacher tell lies. He said as long as I do my folio, I'll pass my paper. I didn't pass one. But my English I got C."

"Oh, very good. Why do you think you were able to get a C? Who's your teacher then?"

"She beautiful. I look at her beautiful face when she is teaching. That's why I got C".

That Little Kite Must Look Down

*Dedicated to my little kites...................wherever you may be!

Let us read this poem:

How the Little Kite Learned to Fly

'I never can do it,' the little kite said,'
As he looked at the others high over his head;
'I know I should fall if I tried to fly.'
'Try,' said the big kite, 'only try!
Or fear you will never learn at all.'
But the little kite said,'I'm afraid I'll fall.'

The big kite nodded:'Ah,well,goodbye;
I'm off;' and he rose towards the tranquil sky.
Then the little kite's paper stirred at the sight,
And,trembling, he shook himself free for flight,
First whirling and frightened, then braver grown,
Up,up he rose through the air alone,
Till the big kite looking down could see
The little one rising steadily.

..................How's the 2 stanzas above? The poem (which can be found in the Form 1 textbook) has one more stanza, actually.

[A serious message: Mr Kee Bak Siang lost his one-year-old child and he's having sleepless nights.... please help him!]

[*While writing this entry , the news about the lost child was aired on tv.]

The poem is about a little kite being shown how to fly. As an adult, I have seen many 'little kites' flying, gracing the sky above. As an adult too, I always encourage my 'little kites' to keep trying as the sky's the limit!

Having said that, memories of learning how to fly may have been erased from the minds of the 'little kites' . Perhaps they have flown high....high enough to be who they wish to be. I should just let the little kites fly as high as they wish, but my 'sharing and caring' conscience does not allow me to sit back and let them destroy their future by making the same mistakes again.

Please accept my reminder...........my little kite, look down and you'll see that the skies may be overcast, and soon it'll become dark and rain is imminent................

Some Like It Hot

I have been reading quite a number of books....in the past few days.

This morning, I grabbed a book from the School Resource Centre's book shelf and it was quite a stunning story of Marilyn Monroe.

She was obviously a true beauty physically, but the way her life came to an end has been a battle of arguments between those who believe that she wanted to take her own life and the other party who wouldn't budge from the theory of a possible murder of this fair lass.

I read every line in the book and I became quite fascinated with the conspiracy theories surrounding her mysterious death. Hmm, she is quite a figure actually ,but her popularity is overshadowed by her more 'popular activities' involving men.

I can't really blame men who are inclined to being flirtatious , even though I really admire men who are loyal and responsible in their conduct.......I really do! As with Ms Monroe, her beauty was able to make a man too feeble to resist her, but, as a 44 , I am wise enough to understand that a lasting relationship does not depend on looks alone......

Diligence Is The Mother Of Good Fortune

All my students in 5A (2008) have learnt the hardships of life through their 'empirical studies' of what constitutes the gems of life.......

My guess is that all of them are now moving on with their lives ..........some into the uncharted territories, while some are going through another adventurous life, in their own way. (I never think lowly of my student's choice in pursuing his own studies....). All of them must continue working hard, for their SPM results do not guarantee a bed of roses for their future.

Since the Excellence Awards Day was just yesterday, I am taking this opportunity to congratulate them all, including those who did extremely well (1A) in the English Language 1119C paper ....here goes...AKJF, JTB, LYV and MNS , your persistent diligence should be emulated by all!

Sex Education (Part 2)

When was the last time I wrote about sex education? Wow, last year..........

I met someone who was grateful to me for enlightening him/her with facts of life including some natural facts related to human beings. To me, I won't take the trouble to sit down and talk about anything vulgar / offensive / 18++ to 'small children' below 41 years. Well, life begins at 40!

I only want these little children to understand that their 'pure minds' are best when they are very focused on their studies, and the best reason for learning is TO ACHIEVE APPROVAL FROM GOD. This means that they must do EVERYTHING in order to receive blessings from God.

They , or rather, we, should take the best care of our body and mind by limiting exposure to seductive pictures or acts which may leave them / us preoccupied with thoughts on lust....

An intimate relationship is only between a husband and a wife...seriously!

Doctors Make The Worst Patients

As my husband was explaining to Mukhlis the importance of using mind-maps , my eyes caught sight of a beautiful mural on the wall next to the school hall. It read 'DREAM more than others think is practical. EXPECT more than others think is possible.' Suddenly , I felt as though I had come to my senses , again.............

My father used to advise me to set my sights on something more than ordinary........... I guess I had always respected him for his ambitious nature. I did not live up to his initial expectation, which was to see me become a lawyer. After I completed my degree, he expected me to become a Valuer (I wonder what it is like to be either one of these.....).

If you think I have let him down, maybe you are right.

But then again, I'm just an ordinary person................on a planet so small compared with the other planets in this galaxy. Similarly, to me other people are ordinary people too..........(sorry, don't feel offended) until they strongly exhibit traits of humility.

What is a good test of humility? Easy. See how a person behaves and treats others who can't retaliate against him/her because of his/her power, wealth or strength...........

Back to the words of wisdom, my first instinct was to share it with my children who were at home and also to someone extraordinary. I was still in the car, listening to my husband's lecture to Mukhlis when I received two replies. One was from my daughter who asked "Mak, have you mistakenly sent me a message?" .................Go figure!

To Have Several Irons In The Fire

Behind me is a pile of clothes to be folded. Meanwhile, my mind has been re-running the movie entitled "Events Of This Week" even though the television is on.

Intermittently, my attention is diverted to the interesting acts of the actors on tv. However, my attempts to enjoy it are not very successful. It's always like this!!! The shows are simply pathetic when I have chosen it as an escapade. Really, I wish to spend hours in front of the tv!!!

The movie in my head at the moment outshines all movies produced even by the Oscar award winning directors.................................

Firstly, I've been trying to wish LCT a very happy birthday but to no avail. The sms failed me, and so did the Facebook. So....happy birthday LCT!

Secondly, the events leading to the Excellence Awards Day have been very intriguing. Of course, fatiguing is almost the other word to describe the whole thing. But, ehem, as a positive thinker I wish to announce just how rewarding it has been to be involved in the team of people who are willing to share the uphill task of making the Excellence Day a success.

May I add that only a mother can understand the joy of embracing her little bundle of joy a few seconds after the baby is born. Yes, that's exactly how I feel. The other half of my feelings are mixed...but there's yin and yang, right? (Pardon me if I'm wrong).

Thank you for the pains and the cries......................

Who's Afraid of The Dark?

WWL was really tickled while H, LCH,LCF, FKW and others looked on

TR reading out his wonderfully written essay to his classmates

Studying in the dark?

Who is the teacher who seems unabated by the darkness of the library? ...when there is a power failure? ....and the students of this class are really the notorious (but actually obedient) 5SJ?

Well, I booked the library at 9 o'clock. I felt as though I was on cloud nine because Friday the 10th was one of my favourite Fridays (no school on the following day) and also there wasn't any meeting I had to chair after school, oh simply loved it!

But again, never count your chicks before they are hatched....

At 11 am, just before my 5SJ students would swarm the library, zapp!! the power supply was suddenly disrupted..........hence, it was the end of the perfect fairytale of my lovely Friday!

When they came, the girls and boys were as jovial as ever...they obediently followed ALL my instructions lest the teacher would turn a tigress (as she used to be). In the dark, anything could happen but they seemed to enjoy the mirage that began to take place in the APD room.

With the aid of the sunlight that sneaked into the room, one by one, they came to the front to read out the essay they wrote last Friday (proudly and confidently). If it got too dark, the teacher started her story of how the students could pass the paper ..... and when they began to get fidgety, the teacher started reading out the rules and regulations of an acceptable code of conduct in her class!

Who says it's not fun being a teacher?

We Are Not All-Knowing

It was indeed an eventful week.

After slowly adjusting my life from a weak person to someone who seemed rejuvenated, it was nonetheless turned topsy-turvy when we decided to do a spring cleaning at home. With an influx of furniture into our small castle, my concept of minimalism had to undergo a conversion.

I remember feeling totally under the weather on Monday (yesterday). Yes, the weather was rather gloomy too. I must have been working for 10 hours the day before....non-stop. I wonder why work seems like a big W-O-R-K lately!

Last Saturday 4 April we had our Sports Day. I liked the march past by every contingent. As one novice Hakim, I stood at the 'Grand Stand' while holding the clipper board and the forms for filling out the marks. I strongly believed that my marks were totally based on their performance, without a single inch of bias. Of course I saw Aisyah in the contingent of Prefects ( pity them, they were as serious as ever and of course they lost). Aisyah ran too for 4x100 metres (and the team emerged champion!) and thank God she's enjoying it. I despise the thought of forcing students into taking part in any competition.

Monday 6 April was the usual assembly day. The function we had that day was the launching of Bulan Pusat Sumber and Anugerah Sahsiah Tinggi for every class. Sadly, some of the students who received sahsiah tinggi were doubted by their peers! I sat closest to the stage and I could hear CLEARLY laughter from one student after his friend's name was called as the recipient of this award. I didn't have to wonder why he laughed out loud that way because as I turned left I saw another student looking puzzled why she was not chosen. It would be unwise for me to interfere with the selection, since nobody had asked for my opinion. Anyway, I never have any reservations over God's fairness and His nature of being All-knowing . Whatever awards that a person receives is his when he deserves it, otherwise it is only superficially granted to him, though he does not ask for it in the first place.

I have long learnt that an award may have a lasting impact only when a person deserves it. Who are we to judge?

The Virus

What if an unsuspecting couple from Mars name their baby "Virus"?

What a pity! This shows the difference between the "know" and the "don't knows".

Being blissfully ignorant is definitely a disadvantage, unless the overwhelming knowledge contains unrelated information.

Some people choose to be a busybody but some choose to be 'blur' , while some choose to be selective and smart. What sort of person are you?

My abstinence from blogging has been a great way of healing from an apparently normal symptoms of fever. However, as the sick person, I feel as though I have been attacked by a malicious strain of virus, albeit the normal treatment from the doctor.

Anyway, I'm still alive. Thank God and I hope you are glad to know that!

The Doctor I Was Meant To Be

I spent less than a minute with the doctor today. I wasn't interested in asking for MC. I needed some medication. Nothing more.

It would be great to have a medical qualification. Sigh...

When I entered 5MW on 11 March, there was another teacher in the class. Phew! And I was 5 minutes late! The teacher was none other than my own principal (whose speciality is Science).

As I was standing somewhere near her, I was wondering if she just wanted to give a pep talk to the 5 MW students. At the same time, I was worried if she would question me for being late.

My worries proved to be futile as she kept on talking about Biology and Science even when the clock was ticking loudly. From time to time, I glanced at my watch (at that time I still had my watch). Oh, I sensed that she sincerely wanted to motivate the students to study hard for these two subjects.

The ways of studying Science and Biology seemed almost effortless, the way she put it. My mind raced to the time when I felt Biology came from Mars, or even Pluto. But, being in the audience to her lecture, Biology seemed like coming from the kitchen, it was just like some 'tips' from a mother, not some intimidating facts that unnerved me when I was 16, or 17. No wonder I could not do medical studies.

The pep talk which was meant for the students was now sapping into my mind and my soul. I like Biology, I am telling myself. Perhaps it's not too late to start doing some serious reading on Biology, I shall try.

But tonight I am really unwell. I should have asked for an MC ! I really should have.....

Be It Ever So Humble, There's No Place Like Home....

It sometimes happens when it's the last day before the school reopens.

Psychologically, my body becomes weak when it's the Sunday before the gates to hell are about to open. No, no, I mean, when it's the last day of the school holiday.

But, this time I genuinely have to take some medication.....I have been sleeping , resting, even though my mind is quite occupied with what else to do to help my students pass and excel in their studies.

By writing this down, I feel a sudden surge of relief....as though my illness has gone completely and I should be doing my school work again, right now. Yes, I feel exactly that. So, see you again tomorrow, God willing.

Lessons After SPM (1982)

All's fair in love and war.

About 30 years ago when I was in a secondary school, my curious and childish mind was always seeking for justice and learning about reality and the truth. I really could not understand why some of my school mates were quite 'cruel' (harsh) in their daily interactions. They believed that being rude was OK. They believed that leaving their friends behind was just part of the game, (who cares, anyway , when their motive was to gain popularity). Some of them were greedy, some were sarcastic, some would not share anything such as past-year paper with others and some would talk about boys as though all the boys in the world were after them (it's an all-girls-school).

I liked to keep my mouth shut but I did become quite an observer.

My life on the hill in Seremban was great, despite the heartbreaking uncouth attitude of some of the girls there. I did survive!

Nonchalantly, I braved through the 5 years of my stay there. My natural curiosity was partly satisfied with explanations from my parents but I was only totally convinced of what constitutes the right (and wrong) thing to do, after reading a book entitled 'Bimbingan Mukminin' by Imam Ghazali (which was initially done to kill my time after sitting for SPM). Remember there wasn't any P Moral or Civics lessons during that time.

This was my first step into the world of open-mindedness......... (to be continued).

Slowpoke

"What slowpoke?"

It's informal, meh. And it's an American word to label a person who does things too slowly.

How (new/ foreign) words and terms permeate our world of communication.....

I unabashedly pick up words from the youngsters who could be quite imaginative. Well, actually it's fine! Who says we should stop learning once we are 44 years old?

There have been times when I could be slow on the uptake and I need a few seconds to digest the word I just heard from my students. Nevertheless, it's still fine with me.

A word of caution though, don't (blindly) imitate the words uttered in the parliament, or words that become headlines , such as "Damned if we do......"

In this case, it's better to be a slowpoke.

Who Wants (or Doesn't Want) To Be A Millionaire?

Millionaire.

Oops, it's not pronounced as 'million air', ok?

A teacher who doesn't rob a bank (as a part-time job) is never going to be a millionaire. Unless, she is married to a millionaire or a millionaire in the making.

What should a very rich teacher do? Stop working?

My better half seems to have a different idea about being a millionaire. "Why not continue teaching if you are very rich? The act of guiding children (our own and our students) should be a lot easier if you are extremely rich".

He's got a point there! Yes, this wishful thinking is a pleasant one.....but I have decided to brush it aside and I'll still be as ambitious as ever in trying to reach out to children who want to learn, whether I'm a millionaire or just a 'million air'.

Competency Test

What's the best method to test a teacher's competency?

Once I attended the PTK course at the Pearl International Hotel. I enjoyed every moment of it.

Of course......I was required to attend the lectures, take part in the public speaking , power point presentation, group work and makan-makan (this was the best thing I did there). The biggest hurdle was to type out a 25-page assignment which was to be submitted when I checked in at the hotel on the first day. The most bitter memory was having to go home after receiving a call from my husband that some people had broken into my house. Well, this happened in 2007, the year of thefts!!!!

A few days ago someone stole a precious item while I was praying at the surau (mmm, what a place to lose your favourite watch). However, my concern was on the person who stole it. She must be needing it so much, or she might have a psychological problem, or she was just an impulsive thief (is there such a term?).

While answering the PTK test, I couldn't help thinking about real-life situations in order to find the best answer. Many options seemed to be correct and I had to rely on my instinct!

Mr Teh was the candidate in front of me and both of us seemed to utilise every minute, flipping through the exam booklet, as though to scour it for the best answers. I met Mr N , a teacher on study leave, who seemed quite amused with the PTK exam. Mr Mgw was also there, but he was one of the invigilators, hence, after waving at him , I quickly put on a straight face, so that he would know that I was on my best behaviour, not trying to complicate his role in overseeing the exam.

The results would be disclosed in a few months time....I would hope to see a '4' this time, Amen!

School (Not So) Holidays

I simply enjoyed the English Camp we had last Saturday. It was meant for the form one students only , perhaps next time the other students would be invited too!

At the same time there was a Kem Kecemerlangan or simply an extra class for the SPM and PMR candidates. My daughter was of course there. My son Mukhlis, was also there as an 'alien'. He seemed to appreciate the lessons given by the SEMEKAR teachers, in which I hope would mean that he felt more comfortable to do his revision before sitting for SPM in November this year.

Myself? Great! I am going to sit for my PTK (Competency Test) tomorrow.

Immediately after the test I will be teaching the PMR candidates.

I hope I will be able to answer the questions correctly. At present there is no proper Workbook to guide me. I must use whatever wisdom left in me and I must spare some wits in me so that I will be able to shoot at the right answers.

Just now I browsed through a few of my favourite blogs. Gosh, some bloggers care to include my photo in their blogs. (But I wonder why I am less photogenic now?) Nonetheless, I have only myself to blame,.......must remember to eat less and apply some cream, and do it every day, without fail!

Anyway, I am still smiling right now. Even after the discovery of the photo...and while preparing myself for that test (PTK). Then, why am I writing now? Gtg..........

The 12 of March 2009

This long awaited day had finally come .............and left me.............

I might have not mentioned it to anyone before but I wish to admit the fact that I really owe all my former students a very valuable lesson - which is a series of 'lessons' involving bonds and relationships , apart from lessons regarding perfecting my own instructions in class.

Thank you very much.

To all my students who have done me proud by achieving better results than they normally achieved last year, congratulations!

My beloved son didn't score as many As as he had had in his dreams , but I was really grateful to God who had granted my wish to see him stand tall despite any hardships. This happened on Thursday , 12 March 2009.

After losing to SMK Taman Desa (again! But my debaters and I became a lot wiser now, and Aisyah was the best debater), I rushed back to school to meet with my former students as they might have something to share with me. Yes, they surely did! Evon was smiling, showing her 1A and 1A for the English 1119 (plus the Cambridge English) paper. My car door was still ajar when I was shown another piece of results slip. This time I was asked to find '2A' on the slip. But, hey, I couldn't find any! Congratulations to Aaron for the remarkable results! Smiles...

Later, I met YBY and CKM and HCC, all of whom scored 3B for the English paper. I had to hold my tears when LCX showed me her results... the feelings were simply indescribable. I did not even go to the lab (that was where the results were issued) - my first time after many years in this school. TWS, LCH, TMJ, CCY, LHD, LCW and even NG came to see me. I spent the rest of the day with TWS, LCH,TMJ, CCY, LCX, MN, AFHH, AINAA , INID and AKJF, rejoicing in our good fortune (it was not about the results), it was more on enjoying the moments we were having together.

The whole day (and later that night) was about connecting with people through whatever means possible. As I have mentioned earlier, it's about bonds and relationships.....

I hope my beloved son, my beloved niece and my beloved students have not forgotten about humility. Do thank all (yes, I mean ALL) your teachers personally or at least pray that God will protect them especially on the Judgment Day. I think I don't mind the latter.

The Scary Encounter

After 'residing' in my office room for more than a year, I begin to wonder if people want to avoid coming to see me. Do they dread the idea of sitting across the table? Waiting for me to check the reports to be submitted to my boss?

I haven't found a concrete piece of evidence to support my perception of their visits.

Anyway, I remember feeling most uncomfortable to enter my boss's room during the first 12 years of my working life. It was only in 2002 the fears left me and I found myself going in to see Pn LKL with so much ease. A heartiest thank you to her who always tried to unearth my true potential.

For a person who 'reads' people using my sixth sense (though 'he' won't believe me!), I am sometimes baffled at how some people have the guts to see our boss to plead with her to be exempted from certain duties. I guess they are left with not much choice, I mean they are desperate, and they mean well, actually.

All in all, as one grows 'younger' , one has to learn to take up risks.....so whether it is scary or not, one might as well face up to it.

Am I Cruel?

"Teacher, why no blog post, lately?"

Owh, that's a cute question.

"In January also you didn't update your blog!", exclaimed another.

Ahha....this one is an accusation! (Gotcha! I was just kidding)

No, there is no acceptable excuse from me regarding my failure to update my blog.

Firstly, I had been quite ill (on and off). Secondly, I began to feel the creeps every time I wished to put my thoughts in writing. Thirdly, the first and second excuses were simply lame!

By the way, just now, after giving in to the demands of all the men in my house-(who insisted on watching 22 men running after one ball), I decided to change course and instead of painfully watching the football match, I sat in front of the computer monitor to check my social network friends' updates. As you can guess, some of them are my former students, while some are friends whom I have yet to meet. I wonder if they too wonder about me?

But, hey, anyway, sorry for the cold treatment from me for the past 13 days....I am not that cruel.

We Won!

My passion has never subsided. No matter how unwell I might be.

Before

After
(Hanani, Fatimah, Aisyah,Jolene,Nadhirah,Navin, Zarul, Sarah, Atiqah
with Pn NW and Pn R)

My little angels and Pn NW and Pn R did not disappoint me when they courageously took part in the inter-school debate competition (Rounds 1 and 2) one day after I could not come to school (MC).

Please refer to the photos above. The first one was taken before they went to SMK TAR and before they debated upon 'Women Make Better Bosses' and 'Media Is Corrupting Our Society'. They had won in both rounds!

Congrats Atiqah, Jolene, Aisyah, Navin, Sarah, Nadhirah, Zarul, Hanani and Fatimah; my little angels!

MC

The limping me had regained her strength after taking some drugs given by the doctor.

I slept and slept and slept in the morning. The phone rang from time to time but I was adamantly not getting up from my wonderful sleep.

However, at 3 pm, Pn R contacted me about one of the debaters who failed to show up for the last meeting. Oh, poor girl. My heart went to her for the heart-ache and headache that she had to endure.

Later, I decided to go to school to pick up my daughter and to check the work to be done on Wednesday. When we left school at 6pm, my sudden renewed energy made me help my husband run some errands.

Tomorrow the debaters are going to SMK Tuanku Abdul Rahman....they are good and they will prove their worth, I'm sure!

But You Are!

It was quite dark and I was awakened to the sound of television. "What time is it?", "Am I late for school?". I looked at the clock. "God! 6 o'clock!"

I tried to figure out where I was. Slowly, everything came back to my mind. I had slept for one and a half hours, starting from 4.30 pm, the time I reached home from the debate practice.

This time my head was spinning and I felt knocked-out! I almost had to drag my feet to the bathroom! Oh no, this was disaster. My body was telling me to rest and rest and rest.

With a thick skin, I went to the clinic to get the drugs and to ask for a 'medical chit' for tomorrow. I knew that it would be quite the same when I was at home (because I would still contact a few teachers regarding work that had to be completed but this time round I surrendered to the demands of my body (and my soul) , which was to get a good sleep in the morning of Tuesday 24 February, instead of stubbornly entering the classes to teach. I ain't that young anymore.....

Debate 09

Even though I usually have to teach the 3 Yasmeen until 4pm on Mondays, I don't feel burdened by it. This is because the students are always ready to learn at this unfavourable hours!

Today, by chance Puan N had to go to the hospital at 10 am, hence I voluntered myself to teach the 3Y during her class. That gave me an opportunity to be with Pn R and our debaters for our final preparation before the competition this Wednesday.

The motion for the first round is "Women make better bosses".

Frankly, I am not sure whether I am personally in favour of this motion. What do you think? I am a woman myself and my leadership style is greatly influenced by my belief that we must work hard without giving monetary gains as our priority. With this belief, many men wouldn't like to work under me. On the other hand, I believe in being just and indiscriminating, hence, any man or woman of a sound mind would agree with me that it is definitely what should happen in our daily lives.

But I don't really fancy taking up a high post, sad, is it not? Whatever it is, I truly want to do my best without bothering to back-stab a colleague in order to climb the ladder of 'ranking' in an organisation. If I deserve it, so shall I be given a post, that is so important that people are envious of me...

Back to the debate, the debaters are one happy lot of youngsters, I don't wish to dampen their spirits by giving any negative comments. On Wednesday, they will fight the battle, good luck guys!